Why Spider-Man 3 did better than Pirates of the Caribbean 3 at the Box Office...


So we all know one of the biggest battles at the box office this summer was going to be between Spider-Man 3 and Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End. Now after both films have been released -- we see that the winner was Spider-Man 3. How does one predict which one will do better before they come out? I am sure Hollywood executives have been toiling over this for years, but I believe I have the answer...

The Old Korean Couple theory.

Yes, that is right -- “The Old Korean Couple theory”. My theory is this: If an old Korean couple that doesn’t regularly go to the movies, who have no real interest in movies other than the soaps they watch on the multicultural channel, show up at the theater for your movie -- then it is going to be a guaranteed smash at the box office.


Example -- when I went to see Spider-Man 3, the theater was packed from the front to back row and who was sitting next to me?... The Old Korean couple. The man spent the whole film fidgeting, eating, looking at his shoes, and even taking a mini-nap half way through. The wife spent the whole film looking through her purse, fidgeting as well, and also examined her shoes approximately every time Peter Parker whined about something (which is quite often). It was clear they did not understand English very well (they would frown during heavy dialogue scene) and it was clear that they did not know much about Spider-Man or his mythology (more frowning during villain genesis and fight scenes). So why were they there? Because -- they felt they had to be there for whatever reason they gathered from all the marketing and hype.


When I went to see Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End... the Korean couple was not there.


Other examples:

Superman Returns: Not there.

POTC 2: Dead Man’s Chest: There.

Shrek 3: There.

Zodiac: Not there.

Norbit: There.

300: There.

Grindhouse: Definitely not there.


I rest my case.

The Box Office Superstar Secret


I just watched “The Pursuit of Happyness” starring Will Smith the other day and it raised an interesting question for me -- what makes Will Smith and other popular leading actors such powerhouses at the box office? After a long lunch hour, I discovered the answer was: If you can imagine an actor walking down the street by themselves and have no problem walking up to them without feeling scared or intimidated -- then they have the X-Factor for being a Box Office Superstar.

Will Smith is now the most powerful actor in Hollywood with a career box office total of $4.4 billion, followed by Johnny Depp and Ben Stiller. Why? Think about it... See! My answer works. You can imagine walking up to any of those actors and not feel intimidated. Instead you imagine receiving a warm greeting, some good laughs, and probably a lot of great photos.

The previous box office kings used to be the two Toms (Tom Hanks & Tom Cruise) and Mel Gibson. Now, think back... yeah, you used to be comfortable around them, but not anymore, right? Tom Cruise... scary. Mel Gibson... jerk. Tom Hanks... well, Tom Hanks actually is still dependable at the box office (ignore LadyKillers and refer to The Da Vinci Code).

So, a tip to casting agents and Hollywood executives -- when deciding on a leading man for your film, forget about good looks and just go with the “Walking down a street...” theory of mine.

On a Tuesday night that felt more like a Friday night, the 1st day of May in the year 2007 -- John Mayer returned to Vancouver, BC.

I have been a fan of John Mayer since day one of his career. Before the Grammy awards, before the Rolling Stone covers, before Jessica Simpson... there was a guy who was the same age as me who sang about the things I thought about and wanted to say but didn’t know how. John Mayer was my ambassador of inspiration.

Now at the discerning age of 29 -- we both are a little bit more jaded but we both still believe that the “heart of life” is good. We still see the world through a good sense of humour and we both still believe where we came from is good, but where we are headed is even better.

Your music will always inspire me and I hope we can continue to grow old together.

Thank you, John.


5/01/07
Pacific Coliseum
VANCOUVER, BC

Opening Act: Kathleen Edwards


SET LIST

Belief
No Such Thing
Good Love is On the Way
Slow Dancing in a Burning Room
Clarity
Waiting on the World to Change
Bigger Than My Body
The Heart of Life
Vultures
I Don't Need No Doctor
Why Georgia
Gravity

-- encore --

Your Body is a Wonderland
I'm Gonna Find Another You

“10 people will fight. 9 people will die. You get to watch.”



The Condemned
Starring Stone Cold Steve Austin, Vinnie Jones, Rick Hoffman
Written by Scott Wiper and Rob Hedden
Directed by Scott Wiper


With mass audiences migrating over to the internet for their “tubing” -- the concept behind the Condemned is a very plausible one. Why go to the major networks that are controlled by censors when you can stream your show live to the world and have content like a death fight between 10 death row convicts on a secret remote island with freedom being the prize. The concept is nothing new as we have seen the same plot used in The Running Man and Battle Royale and unfortunately for the audience not quite as entertaining either.

Whether you watch professional wrestling or not, you are probably aware of a character named Stone Cold Steve Austin. He is the star of The Condemned, co-produced by the film division of WWE (his employer). There is no arguing the fact that he is an entertaining fellow and whenever he appears on screen, you do find yourself paying attention and entertained. Unfortunately, the director doesn’t know how to make a good action film.

Director Scott Wiper shoots the fight sequences with very narrow angles and doesn’t quite know how to “show-off” the talent. All the audience really sees is a whole bunch of blur and no clear action. He unfortunately is not a very good writer either (co-writer with Rob Hedden). Like I said, the premise of the film is an entertaining one based on previous films that have used it -- but The Condemned just comes off uneven and unclear. I have never been so bored at an action film before.

Being a fan of the WWE and action films -- I was sorely disappointed with The Condemned. I came out of the theater with a headache and “stone cold” bored out of my mind.