*Buddy 'Aces' Israel: You're looking at me like, like... I just asked you the fucking square root of something.



Smokin’ Aces
Starring Jeremy Piven, Ray Liotta, Ryan Reynolds
Written and Directed by Joe Carnahan


THE CASE: A bunch of contract killers try to knock off a Vegas magician-turned-gangter-turned-snitch and a bunch of FBI agents try to prevent this from happening.


THE GOOD: The movie ended. It was written and directed by acclaimed Narc director, Joe Carnahan (we will get back to this in the next section). Common, Alicia Keys, and Jason Bateman were the best parts of this sad piece of work. Ray Liotta and Jeremy Piven were good also -- but when surrounded by crap, you soon become crap. As you can tell, I don’t have much to say about this Tarantinoesque (stop trying to make these kinds of films people! you are talented enough to make your own kinds) film other than bad things.


THE BAD: Shame on you, Mr. Carnahan! After such a visceral and irreverent film like Narc -- you turn around and make a disposable piece of dung like Smokin’ Aces. WTF! You are talented. Why, why, why?! The dialogue and action tries so hard to be cool -- BUT IT SUCKS! The film has no tone (is it a drama? or is it a comedy? or is it an action film?), we don’t care at all about the characters (except for Common and Alicia Keys’ characters who could actually star in a separate film on their own, they are that intriguing), and Ryan Reynolds -- why is Ryan Reynolds is this film -- taking something from bad to worse. I hate Ryan Reynolds!


THE LAW: I have never in my life felt like I have ever wasted my money at the theater -- but after seeing Smokin’ Aces, I am sad to say I felt that way.